Discussion:
Humor & Country music
(too old to reply)
OldMan Zeke
2008-06-13 01:30:03 UTC
Permalink
http://elizabethqe2.org/george/jackson/DesignatedDrinker.wav

Designated Decoy =A0
From the state where drink driving is considered a sport, comes a true
story from the Sunshine Coast, Queensland.
Recently a routine police patrol was parked outside a local
neighbourhood
tavern. Late in the evening the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so
intoxicated that he could barely walk.
The man stumbled around the car park for a few minutes, with the officer
quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity and trying his keys on
five vehicles, the man managed to find his car, which he fell into. He
was
there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and
drove off. Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off
(it
was a fine dry night), flicked the indicators on, then off, tooted the
horn and then switched on the lights.
He moved the vehicle forward a few cm, reversed a little and then
remained
stationary for a few more minutes as some more vehicles left.
At last he pulled out of the car park and started to drive slowly down
the
road. The police officer, having patiently
waited all this time, now started up the patrol car, put on the flashing
lights, promptly pulled the man over and carried out a breathalyser
test.
To his amazement the breathalyser indicated no evidence of the man's
intoxication.
The police officer said 'I'll have to ask you to accompany me to the
Police station - this breathalyser equipment must be broken.'
'I doubt it,' said the man, 'tonight I'm the designated decoy'.

http://elizabethqe2.org/george/jackson/DesignatedDrinker.wav =A0
OldMan Zeke
2008-06-13 23:20:26 UTC
Permalink
What song goes with this1???

A gas station owner in Mississippi was trying to increase his sales. So
he put up a sign that read, 'Free Sex with Fill-Up.' =A0Soon a local
redneck pulled in, filled his tank and asked for his free sex. =A0The
owner told him to pick a number from 1 to 10. =A0If he guessed correctly
he would get his free sex.
The redneck guessed 8, and the proprietor said, 'You were close. =A0The
number was 7. Sorry. No sex this time.'
A week later, the same redneck, along with a buddy, Bubba, pulled in for
another fill-up. =A0Again he asked for his free sex. =A0The proprietor
again asked him to guess the correct number. The redneck guessed 2 this
time. =A0The proprietor said, 'Sorry, it was
3. You were close, but no free sex this time.' As they were driving
away, the redneck said to his buddy, 'I think that game is rigged and he
doesn't really give away free sex.' Bubba replied, 'No, it ain 't
rigged. My wife won twice last week.'

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